blogger #3

                   

Paulette Smith

February 25, 2016

                                                           " Take Care "

                  Drake as know Aubrey is hip-hop king . Drake Started off as a childhood star as he staring in the hit TV show "Degrassi". As Drake  ventures off he became a  rapper/ singer and is  signed to Lil Wayne's YMCMB recording  label. Drake started off with Mixtapes and made his way to making platinum albums. With his Amazing voice and  talent he is unstoppable. From his TV career, being signing to YMCMB, and Platinum albums. Drake is the best of the best. Some people like him and some do not, but Drake is carefree.  On Drake's "Take Care"  album he expresses he inner soul, which he  collaborate with artistes  such as,  Nicki Minaj , Stevie Wonder, Andree` 3ooo , and Lil Wayne and many many more.

                  To begin with,  on Drake's "Take Care" album which came out in 2012, he expresses his inner soul. From songs  off the album like  " Over My Dead Body"  and " HYFR" and  " Headlines". Drake takes Hip-Hop and R&B to  whole another   level.  All these songs off the album he collaborate with top artistes in the game. Making his album "Take Care" Platinum and  number one on Billboard charts. This time around, Drake has a better grasp on his own notoriety and the mind-fucks that come with it. While he expressed wonderfully wounded trepidations about his sudden rise on Thank Me Later, he's learning to embrace it more here. They say more money more problems, my nigga, don't believe it," he raps on closer "The Ride". "I  sure, there's some bills and taxes I'm still evading/ But I blew six million on myself, and I , feel amazing." And on "HYFR (Hell Ya Fucking Right)", he all but gives away his hand, turning his sadness into strategy: "What have I learned since getting richer?/ I learned working with the negatives could make for better pictures." And while he claims "I think I like who I'm becoming" on "Crew Love"-- about as ringing an endorsement you'll get from a guy so bent on exposing his own disappointments-- he's still more interested in contradiction than triumph. Even when staring at a pair of unnatural breasts, he highlights the incision rather than the size: "Brand new girl and she still growing/ Brand new titties, stitches still showing/ Yeah, and she just praying that it heals good/ I'm 'bout to fuck and I'm just praying that it feels good." Drake is  a genius, with all the hard work he put in this album this has to be his best work yet.

The cover of Take Care shows its star sitting at a table, dejected and surrounded by gold, like a hip-hop Midas. Considering some of the money-doesn't-buy-you-happiness sentiments inside, the picture is apropos enough. But it's much too obvious to truly represent what Drake and his crew have done here. A better image would be the grainy, amateur photo he released with "Marvins Room" when he originally leaked it in June, which shows the rapper walking away from a group of private jets, his face obscured by a puff of smoke making its way up to an overcast sky. It lets his reality do the heavy lifting while Drake stands by, taking it all in.

Drake has contribute to hip-hop in R&B in some many ways. He change the game in some many 

ways. He has continue to hold the crown. It will be hard to find another Drake and his music. His music is so relatable and connect with his fans on a whole another level. His music is encouraging and tells a story. Drake music hits top charts back to back and now is coming out with a new album with bigger and better hits.

 work cited list

http://www.rollingstone.com/music/albumreviews/take-care-20111111

http://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/16039-take-care/

Multimodal Project

MULTIMODAL- The multiple modes of communication. There are 5 modes of communication.
linguistic, visual, aural, spatial and gestural.

1. LINGUISTIC MODE- Communication through words.                                                 -wordchoice, language, sentences, writing

     2. VISUAL MODE- Communication through visual aspects

          -color, style, social media. newspapers, etc.

     3. AURAL MODE- Communication by sound.

          -sound effects, noise, music, tone of voice, volume of sound

      4. SPATIAL MODE- Communication through arrangement.

          -organization, arrangement, proximity between people or objects

      5. GESTURAL MODE- Communication through movement.
          -facial expressions, hand gestures, body language, interactions between people

Blogger #3

Due:  Thursday, 3/3

Prompt

Create an abstract for an article related to your artist, album, or the genre of music your album is under.  You must find this article through the library database or google scholar.

1. Read & Annotate 
2. Create an abstract in no more than 250 words 
3. Create an MLA formatted citation (refer to MLA sample info under handouts folder and also refer to purdueowl.com) 

An Abstract Includes....

• A full citation of the source, preceding the abstract.
• The most important information first.
• The same type and style of language found in the original, including technical language.
• Key words and phrases that quickly identify the content and focus of the work.
• Clear, concise, and powerful language.

Abstract Components Include.... In this very order

1. Thesis/Main Argument 
2. Supporting evidence for the thesis in the same order as presented by the author 
3. Results of the research (if applicable) 
4. description of larger contribution 

Blogger #2

Original #1:

“You have to see the people who you are friends with”, she said looking at me with a serious face. “Many of those people that you consider your friends come out to be nobody in your life. Also, you have to realize that society will always criticize, judge, discriminate, be against, and even disappoint you. But keep in mind that nobody has power over you. You have to learn how you make the decisions that you know will make you a better person. Your parents will always be there for you, and they will always guide you through the right paths.”

Simple Sentences

You have to see the people who you are friends with. she said looking at me with a serious face. Many of those people that you consider your friends come out to be nobody in your life. you have to realize that society will always criticize judge discriminate be against and even disappoint you. keep in mind that nobody has power over you. You have to learn how you make the decisions. that you know will make you a better person. Your parents will always be there for you.they will always guide you through the right paths.

Semicolons/Commas and FANBOYS

You have to see the people who you are friends with;she said looking at me with a serious face. Many of those people that you consider your friends come out to be nobody in your life. Also, you have to realize that society will always criticize, judge, discriminate, be against, and even disappoint you. But keep in mind that nobody has power over you. You have to learn how you make the decisions that you know will make you a better person. Your parents will always be there for you, and they will always guide you through the right paths.

Original #2

This is all she had to say to me. Those words meant a lot more than what they meant for her. Here I was getting advice from the humble woman who came leaving her parents and her hometown to give me a better future. Her desired was to see me graduate from high school, and my goal was to make her proud. Today I am in college, fighting for my goal to become a sign language interpreter. I identify myself as a person who is determined to fight for their goals, to have a better life and to show my mother that her advice was not taken for granted. Because of that night were I was pretending to be concentrated in my homework, her words helped me who I am now, and like she said society will always be against you but it will never have power over me.

Simple Sentences

This is all she had to say to me. Those words meant a lot more than what they meant for her. I was getting advice from the humble woman who came leaving her parents and her hometown to give me a better future. Her desired was to see me graduate from high school.my goal was to make her proud. Today I am in college.fighting for my goal to become a sign language interpreter. I identify myself as a person who is determined to fight for their goals. to have a better life and to show my mother that her advice was not taken for granted. Because of that night were I was pretending to be concentrated in my homework.her words helped me who I am now.like she said society will always be against .  it will never have power over me.

Semicolons/ Commas and FANBOYS

This is all she had to say to me; those words meant a lot more than what they meant for her. So, I was getting advice from the humble woman who came leaving her parents and her hometown to give me a better future. Her desired was to see me graduate from high school, and my goal was to make her proud. yet today I am in college, fighting for my goal to become a sign language interpreter. I identify myself as a person who is determined to fight for their goals, to have a better life and to show my mother that her advice was not taken for granted. Because of that night; were I was pretending to be concentrated in my homework, her words helped me who I am now, and like she said society will always be against you but it will never have power over me.

Blogger #2

Original #1
    My academic career has been filled with high and lows. Overall, I have had some of my best experiences within a classroom or learning something. Growing up in my household, my parents have always pushed education; as well as my grandparents.

Simple sentences:
   
     My academic career. Has been filled with high and lows. Overall. I have had some of my best experiences. Within a classroom or learning something. Growing up in my household. My parents have always pushed education. As well as my grandparents.

     Semicolons/ commas & FANBOYS:

My academic career has been filled with high and lows. Overall, I have had some of my best experiences within a classroom or learning something. Growing up in my household, my parents have always pushed education; as well as my grandparents.

Original #2

     As a child, I attended private schools from kindergarten to sixth grade. My life growing up in a private school was a great experience for me. The only thing is that, I've been bounced from different schools each year. The schools I attended were Children's " R" US, Tower of Faith Christian Academy, Optimal, and Praise Temple. In the 2nd grade, I went to Praise Temple with my older sister and younger brother. At that time, school started at 8:00 am, and the doors opened at 7:00am. When my mother was getting ready to drop us off; she noticed that the parking lot was empty. We waited and waited until the teachers arrived to open the school. The teachers were always late for some reason. One thing that I like about my mother, is that she never left our side until we were 100% safe. She told us that she rather be late to work than leaving us by ourself. Suddenly, I seen a lot of cars passing by; people walking down the street, and  hearing sirens of the police pulling people over. I was standing in front of my sister (facing towards her), shaking and afraid while my heart beating fast. I was worrying about if a stranger was going to pop out of nowhere. My sister noticed I was afraid, so she looked at me and said , " No one will ever do anything bad to you, because  God is with you every step of the way".  A few minutes later, I started to feel better once my sister told me that. Finally, our principal arrived, and she apologize for being late. My mother had told the principal that she had to be at work a little earlier. Our principal came up with an idea to have my mom drop us off at her house, so our principal can take us to school. Once the principal told my mom, she couldn't believe that a principal would think of something like that. My mother told us that it was nothing but God, and that you can tell that he was watching over us; to make sure we were alright.

Simple Sentences:

     As a child. I attended private schools from kindergarten to sixth grade. My life growing up in a private school. Was  a great experience for me. The only thing is that. I've been bounced from different schools each year. The schools I attended were Children's " R" US, Tower of Faith Christian Academy, Optimal, and Praise Temple. In the 2nd grade.I went to Praise Temple with my older sister and younger brother. At that time, school started at 8:00 am. The  doors opened at 7:00am. When my mother was getting ready to drop us off. She  noticed that the parking lot was empty. We waited and waited. Until the teachers arrived to open the school. The teachers were always late for some reason. One thing that I like about my mother. She  never left our side until we were 100% safe. She told us that she rather be late to work than leaving us by ourself. Suddenly, I seen a lot of cars passing by. People walking down the street. Hearing sirens of the police pulling people over. I was standing in front of my sister (facing towards her) shaking and afraid. While my heart beating fast. I was worrying about if a stranger was going to pop out of nowhere. My sister noticed I was afraid. She looked at me and said. No one will ever do anything bad to you. God is with you every step of the way.  A few minutes later. I started to feel better once my sister told me that. Finally our principal arrived. She  apologize for being late. My mother had told the principal. She had to be at work a little earlier. Our principal came up with an idea to have my mom drop us off at her house. Our principal can take us to school. Once the principal told my mom. She couldn't believe that a principal would think of something like that. My mother told us that it was nothing but God. That you can tell that he was watching over us. To make sure we wer alright.

     Semicolons/ commas & FANBOYS:

     As a child, I attended private schools from kindergarten to sixth grade. My life growing up in a private school was a great experience for me. The only thing is that, I've been bounced from different schools each year. The schools I attended were Children's " R" US, Tower of Faith Christian Academy, Optimal, and Praise Temple. In the 2nd grade, I went to Praise Temple with my older sister and younger brother. At that time, school started at 8:00 am, and the doors opened at 7:00am. When my mother was getting ready to drop us off; she noticed that the parking lot was empty. We waited and waited until the teachers arrived to open the school. The teachers were always late for some reason. One thing that I like about my mother, is that she never left our side until we were 100% safe. She told us that she rather be late to work than leaving us by ourself. Suddenly, I seen a lot of cars passing by; people walking down the street, and  hearing sirens of the police pulling people over. I was standing in front of my sister (facing towards her), shaking and afraid while my heart beating fast. I was worrying about if a stranger was going to pop out of nowhere. My sister noticed I was afraid, so she looked at me and said , " No one will ever do anything bad to you, because  God is with you every step of the way".  A few minutes later, I started to feel better once my sister told me that. Finally, our principal arrived, and she apologize for being late. My mother had told the principal that she had to be at work a little earlier. Our principal came up with an idea to have my mom drop us off at her house, so our principal can take us to school. Once the principal told my mom, she couldn't believe that a principal would think of something like that. My mother told us that it was nothing but God, and that you can tell that he was watching over us; to make sure we wer alright.

Blogger #2

Original #1:

Throughout my high school years, I met a lot of people mostly temporary and saw so many new faces. Also I had a lot of teachers, I can't forget them. Now I think about how my life would've been if I would of stay in the same high school seeing the same people for 4 years and graduating with them. Too see how things would've turned out. I’m glad now that it's all in the past. No more moving for me, hopefully.

Simple Sentences:

I met a lot of people mostly temporary and saw so many new faces. I had a lot of teachers. I can't forget them. Now I think about how my life would've been if I would of stay in the same high school seeing the same people for 4 years and graduating with them. Too see how things would've turned out. I’m glad now that it's all in the past. No more moving for me, hopefully.

Semicolons/Commas & FANBOYS:

Throughout my high school years; I met a lot of people mostly temporary and saw so many new faces. Also I had a lot of teachers, I can't forget them. Throughout my high school years, I met a lot of people mostly temporary and saw so many new faces. I had a lot of teachers, so I can't forget them. Now I think about how my life would've been if I would of stay in the same high school seeing the same people for 4 years and graduating with them. Too see how things would've turned out. I’m glad now that it's all in the past. No more moving for me; hopefully.

Original #2

Growing up as a kid was all fun and games, but when it came to moving, I disliked it a lot more than many people. Moving meant a new house, new friends, and a new school. The first thing that would come to my mind that we were moving as a kid you get angry at your parents, but I would just think about the new school, I was going to go to and new friends I had to make. Friends were important in those times, but now I don't have friends nor do I have care for them at all now, I’m a bit older. I can consider myself antisocial at times, this was caused by all that moving. I could picture myself in the class introducing myself to everyone that I didn’t know very nervously, you could tell I was nervous, by the way I was looking down and not making eye contract with any students. Then taking a seat in the back of the class, where I would usually always sit. It would also be the worst day of my life but I knew it was only going to be temporary and eventually, I’ll get over it. I was actually negative about moving. A conversation would start between my parents and I about the whole moving situation, they would just respond with, “You’ll make new friends”. They were actually right for the moment, I would end up making more temporary friends. As I started moving more it became temporary to make friends because I knew I was never going to see the people at my temporary school.

Simple Sentences:

Growing up as a kid was all fun and games. Moving meant a new house, new friends, and a new school. The first thing that would come to my mind that we were moving as a kid you get angry at your parents. I would just think about the new school I was going to go to. Friends were important in those times. I don't have friends nor do I have care for them at all now. I’m older. I can consider myself antisocial at times. I could picture myself in the class introducing myself to everyone that I didn’t know very nervously. You could tell I was nervous. I was looking down and not making eye contract with any students. Then taking a seat in the back of the class. Where I would usually always sit. It would also be the worst day of my life. I knew it was only going to be temporary. I’ll get over it. I was actually negative about moving. A conversation would start between my parents and I about the whole moving situation, they would just respond with, “You’ll make new friends”. I would end up making more temporary friends. As I started moving more it became temporary to make friends because I knew I was never going to see the people at my temporary school.

Semicolons/Commas & FANBOYS:

Growing up as a kid was all fun and games, but when it came to moving, I disliked it a lot more than many people. Moving meant; a new house, new friends, and a new school. The first thing that would come to my mind that we were moving as a kid you get angry at your parents, but I would just think about the new school, I was going to go to and new friends I had to make. Friends were important in those times, but now I don't have friends nor do I have care for them at all now, I’m a bit older. I can consider myself antisocial at times, this was caused by all that moving. I could picture myself in the class introducing myself to everyone that I didn’t know very nervously, you could tell I was nervous, by the way I was looking down and not making eye contract with any students. Then taking a seat in the back of the class, where I would usually always sit. It would also be the worst day of my life but I knew it was only going to be temporary and eventually, I’ll get over it. I was actually negative about moving. A conversation would start between my parents and I about the whole moving situation, they would just respond with; “You’ll make new friends”. They were actually right for the moment, I would end up making more temporary friends. As I started moving more it became temporary to make friends because I knew I was never going to see the people at my temporary school.

   

Blogger #2

    Original #1

           Mexico is my hometown, where I was born and lived the first eight years of my life. I don't remember most of the things but I do remember waking up everyday to give food to the chickens my dad had. My dad had always tried his best to give me and my three siblings the best experiences. My house in mexico was far from the city it was like a ranch full of fruit trees around the large yard. A house with a large bedroom with a huge restroom on the side and a large kitchen by the living room. It wasn't a big house for a family of six members but we felt comfortable and thankful.

  

Simple Sentences

         Mexico is my hometown. where i was born and live eight years of my life. I don,t remember most of the things. I do remember waking up early everyday to give food to the chickens my dad had. My dad had always try his best to give his family the best experiences. My house is in mexico was like a ranch. A house with large rooms. It wasn't a big house for a family of 6 members, We felt comfortable and thankful.

Semicolons/commas & Fanboys

Mexico is my hometown, where I was born and lived eight years of my life. I don't remember most of the things but I do remember waking up early every day to give food to the chickens my dad had. My dad, had always tried his best to give me and my three siblings; Albis,Cassandra, and Martha the best experiences.My house in mexico was far from the city, it was like a ranch full of fruit trees around the large yard. A house with a large bedroom, a huge restroom on the side, and a large kitchen by the living room. It wasn't a big house for a family of six members but we felt comfortable and thankful.

  Original #2

My first two years living in the United States where complicated. The only language I spoke was Spanish. Entering a classroom for my first time was a big challenge for a little shy girl, I was at that time. My first day of class I was wearing a pink sweater and my hair in a pony tail. My face expressions showed how nervous and scared I was. As entering the large colorful classroom with a lot of books around it, the teacher presented me with the class saying I was the new student. I couldn't understand anything my teacher or classmates said. Roosevelt Elementary located in the city of Compton where i have been living my past years. It was challenging after days of attending school. It took me months to realize that this was going to be our permanent place to now call home.

Simple Sentences

My first two years living in the United States where complicated. the only language I spoke was Spanish. Entering a classroom for my first time was a big challenge. My first day of class i was wearing my favorite clothes. My face expressions showed how nervous and scared I was. As entering the classroom my teacher presented me to the class saying I as the new student.  I couldn't understand anything my teacher or classmates said. Roosevelt Elementary located in the city of Compton. It was challenging afters days of attending school. It took me months to realize that this was going to be our permanent place to now call home.

 Semicolons/Commas & Fanboys

My first two years living in the United States where complicated. the only language I spoke was Spanish. Entering a classroom for my first time was a big challenge for a little shy girl, I was at that time. My first day of class, I was wearing a pink sweater and my hair in a pony tail. My face expression showed how nervous and scared I was. As entering the large colorful classroom with a lot of books around it, my teacher presented me with the class saying "meet our new student". I couldn't understand anything my teacher or classmates said. Roosevelt Elementary located in the city of Compton, where I have been living my past years. It was challenging after days of attending school. It took me months to realize that this was going to be our permanent place to now call home.

Blogger #2

Blogger #2

I never took school seriously. Most of my assignments that I completed received a “D” or a “C”, and I remember waiting until the last minute to complete them. I mean it took me four years and four extra months to get my high school diploma; I never thought about going to college. My plan was always to get out of high school find a good paying job and then I would see what happens. It was not like if my teachers were not motivating me, it was just that I thought hanging around with friends was the most important thing at the time. My parents did their best to try to motivate me; my dad tried so many punishments and rewards that they eventually gave up so they told me to complete school on my own. They always said to me “ an education is one of the most important things in life, without it it will be very hard to become successful ”, but of course I never listened to them.

I never took school seriously. Most of my assignments that I completed received a “D” or a “C”. I remember waiting until the last minute to complete them. I mean it took me four years and four extra months to get my high school diploma. I never thought about going to college. My plan was always to get out of high school find a good paying job and then I would see what happens. It was not like if my teachers were not motivating me it was just that I thought hanging around with friends was the most important thing at the time. My parents did their best to try to motivate me. My dad tried so many punishments and rewards that they eventually gave up so they told me to complete school on my own. They always said to me “ an education is one of the most important things in life. Without it it will be very hard to become successful ”. I never listened to them.

I never took school seriously; most of my assignments that I completed received a “D” or a “C”, and I remember waiting until the last minute to complete them, and it took me four years and four extra months to get my high school diploma; I never thought about going to college, for my plan was always to get out of high school find a good paying job and then I would see what happens; it was not like if my teachers were not motivating me, it was just that I thought hanging around with friends was the most important thing at the time, yet my parents did their best to try to motivate me; my dad tried so many punishments and rewards that they eventually gave up so they told me to complete school on my own, and they always said to me “ an education is one of the most important things in life, without it it will be very hard to become successful ”, but of course I never listened to them.

One late afternoon in my year as a junior in high school, I had just finished soccer practice for the school’s team, and I was waiting for my dad to pick me up. I was waiting in the sidewalk talking to my friends, when I saw my dad’s black Chevy avalanche pull up. I opened the door and the smell of bread was in abundance in the air; you see my dad is a baker, and that truck always smells like bread. I got in the truck, and my dad greeted me with one very disappointing yet very serious greet “que paso“. Now my dad always says hello like that, but is usually followed by “mijo” when he is addressing me. I immediately knew something was wrong, so for the ten minute trip from the park to my house I stood quiet afraid that he might burst in anger if I asked him anything. We arrived home; as we pulled up to the driveway of my two story white colored house, I began to feel sick, as if I was going to vomit because I was so nervous thinking that I had done something wrong, and my dad was going to scream at me at any time. I opened the door to get out of the truck, walked over through the pathway surrounded by grass, and entered through a large white door into my home.

One late afternoon I had just finished soccer practice for the school’s team. I was waiting for my dad to pick me up. I was waiting in the sidewalk talking to my friends. I saw my dad’s black Chevy avalanche pull up. I opened the door and the smell of bread was in abundance in the air. That truck always smells like bread. I got in the truck. My dad greeted me with one very disappointing yet very serious greet “que paso“. Now my dad always says hello like that. It is usually followed by “mijo” when he is addressing me. I immediately knew something was wrong. For the ten minute trip from the park to my house I stood quiet afraid that he might burst in anger if I asked him anything. We arrived home. We pulled up to the driveway of my two story white colored house. I began to feel sick. I was going to vomit because I was so nervous thinking that I had done something wrong and my dad was going to scream at me at any time. I opened the door to get out of the truck. I walked over through the pathway surrounded by grass. I entered through a large white door into my home.

One late afternoon in my year as a junior in high school, I had just finished soccer practice for the school’s team, and I was waiting for my dad to pick me up; I was waiting in the sidewalk talking to my friends, when I saw my dad’s black Chevy avalanche pull up; I opened the door, and the smell of bread was in abundance in the air; you see my dad is a baker, and that truck always smells like bread; I got in the truck, and my dad greeted me with one very disappointing yet very serious greet “que paso“; my dad always says hello like that, but is usually followed by “mijo” when he is addressing me; I immediately knew something was wrong, so for the ten minute trip from the park to my house I stood quiet afraid that he might burst in anger if I asked him anything; we arrived home, and as we pulled up to the driveway of my two story white colored house, I began to feel sick; as if I was going to vomit because I was so nervous thinking that I had done something wrong, and my dad was going to scream at me at any time; I opened the door to get out of the truck, and I walked over through the pathway surrounded by grass, and I entered through a large white door into my home.

Blogger #2

Priscilla .l

Fanboys

All work and no play for Priscilla;

 I remember waking up at the crack of dawn during the summer and 

At the young age of twelve years old I started to work at my grandmothers restaurant;

Not something that a kid wanted to do for the summer but 

 working in the cafe was a family tradition but For me a death sentence for 

 They might as well put me in jail and throw away the key because 

 My life was over before it even begun,

As a  waitress in the café;

The alarm clock goes off like a murderous scream and 

 I smack it on the floor;

I’m wrapped in my blanket like a warm burrito and 

 Ten minutes  pass and I’m still laying in bed; dreading the cold air, 

Waiting for me in the room then 

My grandmother comes into the room and says in her screechy southern voice; 

“if your not up in five minuets you got somethin comin to you," and 

Five min later I feel a splash of ice cold water in my face and 

I  swear I thought I was drowning;

not to mention I cant swim. 

I jump up gasping for air, 

wet and cold the only thing I could think of was goodmorning Los Angeles and 

I cant wait to move out this fucking house.

Simple 

All work and no play for Priscilla. I remember waking up at the crack of dawn during the summer. At the young age of twelve years old to work at my grandmothers restaurant. 

Not something that a kid wanted to do for the summer. Working in the cafe was a family tradition. For me a death sentence. They might as well put me in jail. Throw away the key because my life was over before it even begun. As a waitress in the café. The alarm clock goes off like a murderous scream. I smack it on the floor. I’m wrapped in my blanket like a warm burrito. Ten minutes  pass and I’m still laying in bed. Dreading  the cold air waiting for me in the room. My grandmother comes into the room and says in her screechy southern voice. “if your not up in five minuets you got somethin comin to you.” Five min later I feel a splash of ice cold water in my face, I  swear I thought I was drowning. Not to mention I cant swim. I jump up gasping for air.  wet and cold the only thing I could think of was goodmorning Los Angeles. I cant wait to move out this fucking house.

Simple

When I was a young girl. My grandmother kind of kept me secluded from the world. I wasn’t allowed to listen to rap music. I couldn’t talk to boys. The only thing I could watch on TV was the Disney channel. Re-runs of the Elvis Presley show until the age of fifteen. My summers consisted of encyclopedia books. My brother and I had to read. Coming home smelling like chicken and biscuit’s. Until this day biscuits and I have a love hate relationships. Since I’m truly in love with bread lol. I absolutely hated my life. There was no excitement. Hiding me from the world made me curious about the things they were trying to keep me away from especially boys. 

Fanboys 

When I was a young girl my grandmother kind of kept me secluded from the world and  I wasn’t allowed to listen to rap music, I couldn’t talk to boys, and the only thing i could watch on TV was the Disney channel and re- runs of the Elvis Presley show until the age of fifteen, My summers consisted of encyclopedia books my brother and I had to read and coming home smelling like chicken and biscuit’s; Until this day biscuits and I have a love hate relationship, since I’m truly in love with bread lol, I absolutely hated my life, there was no excitement and hiding me from the world made me curious about the things they were trying to keep me away from especially boys. 

Blogger#2

                                             



         

                                       Autobiography 

Original paragraph#1

My name is Paulette Smith and  I am 18 teen years old I am from East Africa but born and raised in Compton CA.  I am a High school graduate from LifeLine Educational Charter school.   I have three older brothers and I live a pretty awesome life,  but  I also  live a double life as known as  social media world.  I am what you call insta famous, instafamous is a person that has a big audience on social media such as Facebook and  Instagram etc. My life changed for the worst when I instantly blow up on Instagram by  just posting a picture. It was a Sunday night and I was doing what every teenager do when they are bored  and that is  scroll on Instagram. As I was getting motivated by all my friends posting pictures, I felt it was only right that I do it too. Soon I started to take a million of selfies  but one picture  stood out to me the most, my eyelashes was curled and I had  on  a basic crop top and my hair straight. I did not know that this random selfie would make me insta-famous.  As  I post the picture with only 1,000 followers, my phone instantly  started to vibrate. I started to get  orange numbers and comments on my picture. I was nervous, I started to panic I thought I did something wrong or someone was talking about me and it went viral.  It was a scary feeling. I checked my phone to really see what was all the vibrating for.





Simple sentence #1
1.    My name is Paulette Smith and  I am 18 teen years old. I am from East Africa but born and raised in Compton CA.  I am a High school graduate from LifeLine Educational Charter school.   I have three older brothers and I live a pretty awesome life.  But  I also  live a double life as known as  social media world.  I am what you call insta famous. Instafamous is a person that has a big audience on social media such as Facebook and  Instagram etc. My life changed for the worst when I instantly blow up on Instagram. By  just posting a picture. It was a Sunday night and I was doing what every teenager do when they are bored  and that is  scroll on Instagram. As I was getting motivated by all my friends posting pictures. I felt it was only right that I do it too. Soon I started to take a million of selfies. But one picture  stood out to me the most. My eyelashes was curled. And I had  on  a basic crop top. And my hair straight. I did not know that this random selfie would make me insta-famous.  As  I post the picture with only 1,000 followers. My phone instantly  started to vibrate. I started to get  orange numbers. And comments on my picture. I was nervous. I started to panic. I thought I did something wrong. Or someone was talking about me and it went viral.  It was a scary feeling. I checked my phone to really see what was all the vibrating for.
.


Semi Colon And Commas#2
#2  My name is Paulette Smith, and  I am 18 teen years old and I am from East Africa but born and raised in Compton CA,  I am a High school graduate from LifeLine Educational Charter school ; I have three older brothers and I live a pretty awesome life,  but  I also  live a double life as known as  social media world;  I am what you call insta famous, instafamous is a person that has a big audience on social media such as Facebook and  Instagram etc ,My life changed for the worst when I instantly blow up on Instagram by  just posting a picture, It was a Sunday night and I was doing what every teenager do when they are bored  and that is  scroll on Instagram and as I was getting motivated by all my friends posting pictures, I felt it was only right that I do it too; Soon I started to take a million of selfies  but one picture  stood out to me the most, my eyelashes was curled and I had  on  a basic crop top and my hair straight, I did not know that this random selfie would make me insta-famous but  as  I post the picture with only 1,000 followers, my phone instantly  started to vibrate; I started to get  orange numbers and comments on my picture and I was nervous, I started to panic I thought I did something wrong or someone was talking about me and it went viral and it was a scary feeling and I checked my phone to really see what was all the vibrating for


Original Sentence#2

This experience has  shaped me in so many ways, I learned a big lesson , social media  has made me realize that it is important  to know yourself.   I let things  get to me and  I started   to loose focus on me  Paulette Smith, the basic girl from Compton.  Thinking I was living this glamorous life I thought I had on Instagram made  me realize that is just not me. I have minimize my time on all social media so I would not draw so much attention to myself. Now when I do post things on  Instagram I post my family and my career as a CNA and things that matter to me. I do not have to cover up any flaws and I can just be a regular teenager on social media. I live my life as Paulette Smith and everyone knows that now.  Social media is a crazy thing to be apart of but I learned a lesson and I always do what makes me happy.
Simple Sentence#2

This experience has  shaped me in so many ways. I learned a big lesson. Social media  has made me realize. That it is important  to know yourself.   I let things  get to me. And  I started   to loose focus on me  Paulette Smith. The basic girl from Compton.  Thinking I was living this glamorous life. I thought I had on Instagram made  me realize that is just not me. I have minimize my time on all social media. So I would not draw so much attention to myself. Now when I do post things on  Instagram I post my family and my career as a CNA .And things that matter to me. I do not have to cover up any flaws and I can just be a regular teeneager on social media. I live my life as Paulette Smith and everyone knows that now.  Social media is a crazy thing to be apart of but I learned a lesson and I always do what makes me happy.

Semi Colon and commas sentence#2

This experience has  shaped me in so many ways, I learned a big lesson , social media  has made me realize that it is important  to know yourself and I let things  get to me ;  I started   to loose focus on me  Paulette Smith, the basic girl from Compton and thinking I was living this glamorous life I thought I had on Instagram made  me realize that is just not me, I have minimize my time on all social media so I would not draw so much attention to myself ;Now when I do post things on  Instagram I post my family and my career as a CNA and things that matter to me; I do not have to cover up any flaws and I can just be a regular teenaager on social media, and I live my life as Paulette Smith and everyone knows that now and , Social media is a crazy thing to be apart of but I learned a lesson and I always do what makes me happy,

Blogger #2 autobiography (Tatiana Briscoe)

Original #1:

     When I was 4 years old my mother and I were in the living room on the couch, eating popcorn and watching Home Alone 2: Lost In New York “Mommy where’s my dad?” I didn’t care where we were or what she was doing I just had to know, but she would never 

respond so I just gave up. My mom worked a lot so I was always at the baby-sitter’s house. It seemed like I never went home. Half of my toys were over there, my bike, my sega genesis and my skates. But somewhere in between being at the baby-sitter’s and work my mom would throw me the best parties.

Simple sentences:

      When I was 4 years old my mother and I were in the living room laying on the couch. We were eating popcorn. We were watching Home Alone 2: Lost in New York. Mommy where's my dad. I didn't care where we were. What she was doing. I just had to know.but she would never respond. So I just gave up. My mom worked a lot. So I was always at the baby-sitters house. It seemed like I never went home. Half of my toys were over there. My bike my sega genesis and my skates. But somewhere in between being at the baby-sitter's and work my mom would throw me the best parties.

Semicolons/ commas & FANBOYS:

When I was 4 years old my mother and I were in the living room, so we were on the couch, eating popcorn and watching Home Alone 2: Lost In New York

“Mommy where’s my dad?”;

And I didn’t care where we were or what she was doing I just had to know; but she would never respond, so I just gave up, but my mom worked a lot so I was always at the baby-sitter’s house; so it seemed like I never went home, half of my toys were over there, my bike, my sega genesis and my skates. But, somewhere in between being at the baby-sitter’s and work my mom would throw me the best parties. 

Original #2:

I remember one particular birthday party we had pizza, chips, hot dogs, juice and all types of candy. I had the prettiest barbie cake; it was pink, purple and green with a little white barbie doll on top with a blonde ponytail. Other than the nasty purple icing the cake and ice cream was great, and my favorite part at the party was the jumper. I was on top of the world and didn’t want to come down but it was that time. Everybody was singing happy birthday to me and it was time for me to make a wish. I looked around at everybody at the party and looked down at the number 6 candle on my cake, closed my eyes super tight, crossed my fingers and silently wished that I would see my dad. As I blew the candle out I heard all this commotion.“Get your ass away from my house you ain’t welcome here.” “What you mean I’m not welcome? It’s my daughter’s birthday and I brought her a gift.” My eyes lit up with excitement, could it be? Did he just say it’s my daughter’s birthday? “Dad, dad!”

I ran to the gate and my mother snatched me up and ran in the house, and just like that my party was over.

Simple sentences:

I remember one particular birthday party we had pizza chips hot dogs juice and all types of candy. I had the prettiest barbie cake. It was pink, purple and green with a little white barbie doll on top. She had a blonde ponytail. Other than the nasty purple icing the cake and ice cream was great. My favorite part at the party was the jumper. I was on top of the world and didn’t want to come down but it was that time. Everybody was singing happy birthday to me. It was time for me to make a wish. I looked around at everybody at the party and looked down at the number 6 candle on my cake. I closed my eyes super tight crossed my fingers. I silently wished that I would see my dad. As I blew the candle out I heard all this commotion. “Get your ass away from my house you ain’t welcome here.”

“What you mean I’m not welcome? It’s my daughter’s birthday and I brought her a gift.” My eyes lit up with excitement. could it be, Did he just say it’s my daughter’s birthday? “Dad, dad!”I ran to the gate and my mother snatched me up and ran in the house. Just like that my party was over.

Semicolons/ commas & FANBOYS:

      I remember one particular birthday party; we had pizza, chips, hot dogs, juice and all types of candy. And I had the prettiest barbie cake; it was pink, purple and green with a little white barbie doll on top with a blonde ponytail, but other than the nasty purple icing the cake and ice cream was great, and my favorite part at the party was the jumper. I was on top of the world and didn’t want to come down, but it was that time. Now everybody was singing happy birthday to me and it was time for me to make a wish, so I looked around at everybody at the party; and looked down at the number 6 candle on my cake, and closed my eyes super tight, crossed my fingers and silently wished that I would see my dad; and as I blew the candle out I heard all this commotion.

“Get your ass away from my house you ain’t welcome here.”

“What you mean I’m not welcome? It’s my daughter’s birthday and I brought her a gift.”

My eyes lit up with excitement, could it be? Did he just say it’s my daughter’s birthday?

“Dad, dad!”;

So I ran to the gate and my mother snatched me up and ran in the house, and just like that my party was over.

Blogger #2

Due:  Sunday, Feb. 21st 

Prompt


Select one paragraph from your autobiography.

1. Rewrite that paragraph using only simple sentences.  This means that every sentence should only have one thought or idea in it.  There will be no punctuation in this paragraph other than periods to end each simple sentence. 
2. Rewrite the same paragraph using only 1) semicolons or 2) commas and FANBOYS.  This paragraph can only include these two types of punctuation.  

Repeat these steps for one more paragraph.  In the end, you should have a total of 6 paragraphs.

1. Original Paragraph #1 
2. Simple Sentence Rewrite of Paragraph #1
3. Semicolon and comma & FANBOY rewrite of paragraph #1
4. Original Paragraph #2
5. Simple Sentence Rewrite of Paragraph #2
6. Semicolon and comma & FANBOY rewrite of paragraph #2